The Ultimate Democracy

Democracy for the babies is the ultimate democracy: If there would be a genuine democracy in the world, then parents should be prevented from giving their beliefs to their children. Children should be left alone; only after they have become mature should they start inquiring on their own. The function of a parent is great because parents bring new guest into the world who knows nothing but who comes along with some potentials, even certain talent because everybody is unique. Unless his potential grows and unless he uses that talent to its fullest he will remain unhappy, something in him will remain missing, he may accumulate much wealth, he may become famous, he may be respected by the society but he will never know the joy of life. He will go on feeling that somehow something is not there that should be. So because of this, parental conditioning has to be completely uprooted, it is the greatest slavery in the world and only when it is uprooted will man for the first time be able to be authentically free. If the child is brought up in a wrong way then the whole of humanity will be affected.  Because the child is like a seed: if the seed itself is poisoned and corrupted by well-intentioned people and well-wishing people, then there will be no hope for a free human individual, that dream can never be fulfilled because if we force the future to adjust to the past we are trying to repeat the past and that is what has been happening. This has caused miseries in the world and has created hell on earth instead of a paradise.

Still, the world remains in miseries because parents want their children to be like them and that is how they create more miserable people again. This is how the pattern of miseries continues and how there seems to be no possibility of making human beings happy. Somewhere the continuity has to be broken so if parents really love their children, one thing is certain: they will not help their children to be like themselves. They know perfectly well that they have been living in miseries and they have suffered enough. At least they will try in every way to protect their children from being miserable and that must be the basic understanding of parents who really love their children.   A parent can show love, but he will not give his knowledge. He will give all care and caress to the child, but he will not impose his ideology on him, he will not make him belong to his own religion, he will lead the child to be himself, he will share his experiences, but he will not enforce it on him, he will be friendly with the child and he will not play the game of power on the child.

The class of children is the most harmed, oppressed, exploited, distorted class of all classes and the most helpless. They cannot do anything: They have no way of protecting themselves from parental attacks and they cannot escape from it. Anything can be forced on them because they are absolutely vulnerable and parents always take advantage of the helplessness of little children. Down the ages, this has been the rule that the children have to adjust to the parents’ rules because they want their children to be in a certain way, which is programming or conditioning. This should not be any more, parents have to adjust with their children because children are the future and the future should not adjust to the past.

FORBIDDEN DISCUSSION

 In the real sense, it is not a forbidden discussion but people avoid talking about it and I mean talking about their religion especially to someone who does not share their belief. No matter how, everybody  belongs to a religion in one way or the other simply because they were born into a certain religious group, so if  you  claim now that you have no religion then your religion is religion-less. Whenever there is necessity to discuss religion at all, people discuss it casually in order to avoid fight /argument and that is the reason behind why people avoid talking about it because each religion holds on to the belief that their own religion is right while others are wrong.

What is common to all religions is the belief and dogma or doctrine, belief is the assurance that is given to you by others about what you do not really know, while doctrine is nothing but a philosophical system.  And what is philosophy? It is just a rational investigation of questions about existence, knowledge and ethics on how to live or how to deal with a situation.

The so-called religion today is just a system of beliefs and the funniest thing is that true religion has nothing to do with belief. Religion is an experience, not a belief. We know trees by their fruits and if you look at the history of religion you will be surprised that religion has not proved a blessing instead it has proved a curse. The whole history of man is full of bloodshed because of these so-called religions, telling people that if you kill in the name of religion it is not a sin and as a result of these, more people have been killed by religious wars, crusades, jihads. Muslims   killing Christians, Christians killing Muslims, Christians killing Jews, Jews killing Christian, Hindus killing  Muslim s, Muslims killing Hindus, Hindus killing Buddhists ... The whole history of religions so far is bloody.

That is an undeniable fruits of our so called religion of the past till now and these shows that they are all bogus religions, fake or false; they are all talking about love but up till now man have lived in a world of hatred, enmity, jealousy, and possessiveness. We have not yet been able to create even a small oasis of religion hence the whole establishment of the religions is basically anti-love – because they want slaves, they want servants, and they want efficient machines, not men. And these goes against the love that all of them are talking about.

If you know the origin of the word ‘religion’ you can understand what true religion is. The word ‘religion’ is very beautiful. It originated from the Latin noun religio" It comes from a root of three verbs: (1) relegere (to turn to constantly/observe conscientiously); (2) religare (to bind oneself [back]) and (3) reeligere (to choose again) and from this 3 verbs we can understand the meaning of religion.

So religion means: to reunite. With whom?  With yourself, with the source of your being or, to remember again. This word ‘remember’ is also beautiful. It means to become the member again, re-member – to become part of the source again, to go to the source and become the member again. Religion is reuniting with your own source. Religion is remembering, becoming again a part of the organic unity that you were. It has nothing to do with the others.

So the whole search of religion is how to get back to your roots, how to be one with existence again as you were before birth. The way of religion is love. Not all these cultures, traditions they called moralities, and remember that truth is one, so also true morality is universal acceptable not different doctrine.

THE TRUTH OF LOVE RELATIONSHIP

The truth is the reality, either you like it or not, either you believe it or not, it is what it is. It is not pessimistic and it is not optimistic either.  Naturally, a bare or naked truth is not so sweet even sometimes fear arises when you come across the truth.

The following are some of the truth of love relationships:

The relationship can never work out, because of jealousy, possessiveness, and domination, the more you put more effort to make it work out the more the frustration because of your expectation to make it work out.  When you try it out you will realize that you cannot solve it. It is what it is

The relationship will destroy love and this is one of the reasons for it to remain a misery always, so you may not see happiness in a relationship but frustration is certain.  A relationship can't be prepared for because you do not know what you are going to see or meet.  How can you prepare for the unknown?

 People will encounter boredom in a relationship   because the relationship does not allow freedom and the nature of humans are to long or look for the new thing and when there is no freedom to get it, anger, hatred, and jealousy will come.

 A relationship is a closed thing in the sense that it does not allow freedom to do whatever you like. And how do you think a free person will feel, being inside a cage? And what do you think will be the person reaction toward the prison? There are no other reactions than anger, hatred or violent

You can't see a relationship without a problem   because every relationship arises from compulsions or obsession and this will give birth to possessiveness and domination and remember nobody likes to be possessed or to be dominated because we are not an object.  You will encounter love and hatred in relationships and that is the paradox of relationship.

Do not believe this but go and learn, one learns only by experience because truth is subjectivity. Confirm or experiment it whether it is or not then you can reach a conclusion about this truth not before testing it. When you are in a relationship you will get more understanding of this truth and remember to leave your conclusion as a comment on this page.

You don’t need to make this mistake before you can learn from it, although we learn something only when we have experienced it. There is nothing wrong about making a mistake but try not to repeat the same mistake again that is the only stupid thing to do, a mistake is part of the learning process.

Understanding or truth will set you free and remember it is only your personal truth that can set you free.

You can only avoid the misery that is always attached to relationships by not entering into it, but you can just relate, start from friendship then relate with freedom in view but not entering into a relationship and never expect anything to come out of it and anything that you see out of relatedness accept it without complaining it is what it is. 

BECOME ALERT ! RELATIONSHIP DESTROYS LOVE

In a relationship, no one knows if there will be happiness or not? – But one thing is certain: love will be destroyed!  This is what makes all human relationships fail, simply because relationship destroys love, but the question people might have in their mind is how does it destroy love?

Wherever love happens, possessiveness, jealousy, and domination immediately enters and starts using the possibility of love, but all these things that enters starts destroying it gradually. And these things can kill the love before you know it.  When is love destroyed, there will be troubles, conflicts, anger, hatred, and some others things.

Each love relationship proves the topic, because no love relationship is a love relationship at all. It is possessiveness, jealousy, domination, anger, violence and hatred. Psychological monopoly destroys all love and when love is destroyed, naturally you feel the agony of it because the ecstasy of love is missing and you would have invested so much for the love to grow. And the love is not there anymore, you will be left crushed, in a collapse. This is what makes relationships remains a misery.

Love is such a delicate flower. It is very rare to be preserved: it is almost always destroyed. When you love a person there will be no need for you to be possessive. Love is always beautiful in the beginning, love is beautiful is in the end of a relationship, and that is when you will be able to know exactly what love is...not in the beginning of the relationship. Ninety-nine percent of love relationships dies before the ultimate peak is reached; it is a great art to be in love. To fall in love is very easy; to remain in love is very difficult, arduous. Only a few artists of life are capable of remaining in love. Try it, give it a try! Be alert so that you will not destroy it!

Love is an open-ended state and this creates fear – because one never knows where it will take him to. You might be afraid of losing the other, so relationship may be just out of fear,  it might have nothing to do with love. The relationship might just be a kind of security, financial or something else. And when you enter into a relationship, you start dominating each other, you start being jealous of each other, and you start being possessive of each other. Relationships are just beautiful on the surface; but deep down they are a sort of bondage

 The relationship is needed when love is not there. The relationship is a substitute. Become alert! Relationship destroys love, and even destroys the very possibility of its birth.

You have to remember these: jealousy kills love and possessiveness kills love. If you want great love to happen you have to stop being jealous and if you want your life to grow multidimensional it needs freedom. You need freedom and the person you love needs freedom. Freedom needs an expansion, which is growth. If you really love a person, you will allow all the space possible to the person; you will never encroach on his or her freedom.

EVERYBODY'S MIND IS FULL OF SEX

The reason for this, is because everybody is a sexual being and this means that everybody came out from sex. This is one of the things that are causing problems in a relationship, because people are mixing up sexual relationship with love relationship. But it is better to call a spade, a spade if we are ready to dissolve the miseries that are always accompanying all relationships. In most cases, people will be in sexual relationship and claiming or thinking that they are in a love relationship

   The sexual relationship is one thing and love relationship is another. The sexual relationship is a kind of relationship that uses people and reducing them to a thing. Sexual relationship is a kind of relationship that only knows how to take; it does not know how to give, even if it gives, that gift is baiting; hence the sexual relationship remains that of conflict.  

Lust is another name for sexual relationship and lust motive is to have sex  and remember that, there is nothing wrong with having sex, it is one of the great things in this world that people do not know much about , the only thing they do is to abuse it either by repressing it or indulging in it.  Lust means you don’t respect the other at all, you are just after sex. And it is better to be open about it instead of claiming that you love the person. Lust seeks the other because it is his need; he is needy and greedy. If your relationship is defined by sex only and it has nothing more in it, then that relationship will be like a relationship men create with prostitutes and the kind of relationship men have with prostitute is a sexual relationship.

Love relationship is another thing, it moves a little higher, the person involve is no longer using the others as a tools. Love gives dignity to the other, sex takes away all dignity. Love knows how to give and how to take. Love is more harmonious; it is a give-take relationship: one gives, one takes. There is more friendship in it than in a sexual relationship, there’s less antagonism and more accord. Love is a harmony between two. Love is like two universe beating on the same rhythm, dancing hand in hand, melting, merging, and becoming almost an organic unity. If your love fails, it simply means you don’t know what love is and it is an indicator that your initial motive is sex.

In a love relationship sex may happen, and it might not happen; there is no inevitability about it. If it happens then it is part of love, of sharing energy. If it does not happen, that too is part of love. Because love can be expressed in different dimension, at least three dimensions: the physical, which can become sex; the psychological, which becomes friendship; and the spiritual, which becomes communion. And it is possible that in love all three dimensions may be present simultaneously, but they are all part of a loving approach towards life. There is no exploitation; there is no desire to use the others as tools and then throw them away

 Having known this, if you are after sex then it’s better to let it out, or go for a whore instead of pretending to be in a love relationship because you might win the war and loose the battle.

PARADOX OF RELATIONSHIP

Everybody hates the same person they love sometimes and the hatred is always directed to the same person. That is why there’s conflict between lovers, constant quarreling.

Love cannot exist without hate. This is the illogicality of life: hate cannot exist without love either. But if you go into books and if you look through logic, you divide. You say,”Always love, never hate.” This is not true about life it’s like you are creating a fiction of love. And this is what is creating difficulties for people. People expect and desire that a relationship should be a hundred percent joy – which cannot be, which is not naturally possible. No relationship has ever been, no relationship will ever be. A hundred percent joy is not possible through marriage; it is not in the nature of things. People expect a hundred percent joy. That is foolish, that is not practical, and that is living in dreams. And if you expect that much joy you will create more misery than was natural – because there will be more frustration. The higher your desire, the deeper you will feel frustrated. The more perfect an ideal, the more you will feel that you cannot make it, that you fall short

To understand life, this is one of the very fundamentals to see, that each thing implies its opposite and each thing automatically turns into its opposite

When you are in love you think, ”Now I will love for ever and forever” – and you have forgotten how life functions. You might be in love in the morning   and by evening it might turn to hatred or anger – it’s BOUND to arise; you cannot do otherwise. In choosing love you have chosen hate too; that is the other aspect of the same coin. But now you are in misery, you think you are betraying. You might think,”How is it happening? Why is it happening? Why is it happening to me? Why can’t I love forever? Why can’t my lover love me forever? In the morning he was so much interested in me, and now he wants to be alone, left alone. What has happened? Where did I go wrong?”

 Why does everything turn into its opposite? Nobody wants it to be so; still it turns so it is the way of existence; it is how things move. Just as fire burns because it is its nature to burn, so also love has its own nature and this is the nature of existence, that automatically turns into its opposite. Why does it turn into its opposite? Because the opposite is only opposite seen from the  surface. Seen from the deep core of reality it is not opposite but complementary.

A love relationship is really a relationship of love-hatred: coming closer, going away, coming closer, going away. In a love relationship sweetness comes and goes, and when sweetness goes it leaves bitterness behind. A love relationship is a rhythm between sweet and bitter. The truth is that nothing is eternal including love and this understanding will help you to reduce the misery or avoid the problems or frustration in the relationship.

IT WILL NEVER WORKOUT UNLESS…..

Everybody is good alone, but when they come together something goes wrong. I have never come across a wrong person, but every day I come across wrong relationships. It seems almost all relationships are wrong. Why? Because they are two – differently made, differently conditioned,  polar opposites to each other, pulling in different directions, manipulating each other, trying to possess, dominate...  two persons live in two desire worlds, so when they come together those worlds clashes. 

Howsoever you try to manage it; you will never be able to manage it. Nobody has ever been able to manage it. It is made in such a way that it simply remains puzzling. The more you try to make it work out, the more problems they create. The more you try to understand it, the more elusive it is.

It will never work out unless you have solved a more fundamental thing about yourself, without that, you cannot solve it. Two persons that are in confusion, who don’t know who they are – naturally they multiply each other’s confusion, they magnify it. If you want to make an impossible thing possible then start from yourself, by loving yourself, respecting yourself, and being gentle with yourself. Unless you show love towards yourself you cannot love at all. Unless you care about yourself you will not care about anybody else; and this will help you understand what love really is and it will help you love without jealousy, to give freedom to others without being possessive or dominating, these are part of what you need in order to avoid the pitfalls in relationship you have to be a giver before you enter into it, if not you will fall into a pit, although you will come out and try to look for another pit unknowingly. 

It will never workout if you enter into a relationship just because you want someone to love you or because you want to be having sex, so majority of relationships today exist because people want something out of them, They pretend to love each other, but basically they are interested in fulfilling their hunger and once the hunger is fulfilled the false love will disappear.

Naturally when you are hungry the food you are preparing will look very appealing: the aroma, the flavor, even the sounds coming from the kitchen will sound appealing to you. Once you are contented, and you have eaten enough, all the beauty and all the poetry about the food disappears. In fact if you are forced to eat a little more of that food you will become nauseating, sickening;  that  same food which was so beautiful will suddenly become so ugly to eat. 

To make it work out remember you have to be the giver not the needy, and also remember that before you can give out  something you must have it, because when you are trying to give something which you don’t have or you are trying to get something from somebody who has not got it in the first place,  the result will be misery and frustration or how do you think two needy people will be in a relationship without having problems when each one is expecting the other to provide his/her needs?